Finding Oneself in Others

It’s only when I lose myself in someone else that I find myself…. Depeche Mode

Liberating experience of one sapiosexual* young and educated American woman who found freedom and happiness in natural submission to a dominant man.

   It seems surprisingly often that opposites “click” together and coexist in harmony. And the human logic can hardly find proper tools to explain this, except the old stereotypical  ‘opposites attract’ hypothesis. The intimate side of our life is abundant in contrasting dualities. Think of freedom-possession, master-servant and of course love-fear (yes, fear, not hatred). This story was documented in a refined literary style and ornamented by beautiful images on several social media sites. We take the liberty to share some excerpts here. All credits and glory to #JBabyWrites

“Some of us are aroused by intellect. At least this was the diagnosis I tagged myself with.  Where could this lead me? Either to having a reputation of a cold-blooded sarcastic icicle or to a series of crushes on distant hyper-intellectual heroes of all times. But I was lucky to meet You and to be accepted and collared by You…

I am not a veteran of this world and this is the only relationship of this kind I’ve ever entered. You made me discover what it means to “naturally submit”. I previously understood what it meant, but had yet to experience it. Throughout most of my journey in this world and learning about what being a submissive means for me, I was always under the impression that I could only submit in the bedroom and to only a select few…

While the “select few” has not changed, I’ve learned that natural submission changes my perspective on everything else. I no longer think, “I would never do that.” In its place it is now “I will, for the right Dominant.”

Natural submission is not born out of fear. It comes from a much different place. I don’t become a different person, I am still me. The submissive is part of my identity; it’s just a part that rarely finds an outlet. I am sure the same can be said for those who identify as Dominants. With the right submissive, the Dominance is natural and flows freely. There is nothing forced about it.

My sarcasm disappeared, my reactions, thoughts and feelings to You, for You, were all in a submissive context. You give me a compliment and I blush, look away, feeling shy. I do not dare to chuckle at Your jokes, though I see humour in them. I am baffled.

So these words, all of You and are for You.

I became more and more comfortable with the side only You were bringing out in me. I found it completely freeing, enriching and transcendent.

You inspired a lot in me – my individuality, my writing. While I have always found writing as a healthy and rewarding outlet, I have felt the desire to share more of my work…especially the words You stir inside me. Whether it is a conversation we have or just the basic animal-like desire You create beneath my calm exterior, I find myself writing more with You in my life. 

From the start, I knew You are different, I could feel this pull, this energy. You touched me in ways I didn’t know were possible. The desire to please and serve You had me enraptured. I am humbled by You and proud to be the one who experiences everything You are. 

You will never use ten words, when five will suffice. You do not yell or act irrationally. You would never lash out in anger or be cruel just to prove a point. You never demand obedience, You inspire it. 

I get the sides no one else is privileged enough to see or know. I stir You like no other, and get the man and the beast. The parts You keep hidden from others, You share with me. I get Your secrets and Your vulnerabilities. 

You smirk when I’ve said something naughty
You grin when I’ve surprised You
The smile in Your eyes when I say, “Sir”
The way You look in blue
The way You laugh –
All of these things make You incredibly sexy but the thing that makes You the sexiest:


Author: Sue X Seven